Anti-grunt technology

I am genuinely so glad that technological work is being done to protect the more sensitive television viewers; more precisely, to protect viewers of the Wimbledon tennis tournament who blush, or otherwise react in a way to suggest that smelling salts are called for, whenever a tennis player is heard to grunt.

But first, let’s have a look – or a listen – at what this is all about. Let us go to the champion grunter, Ms Maria Sharapova. Here she is. This is indeed distracting. Then again, recently I heard someone say that the tennis was distracting him from her grunting, so maybe not everyone feels the same way.

But for those who do, the fiendishly clever technological experts at the BBC have come up with something. Here’s what we’re told: they have invented something that will leave your Wimbledon enjoyment grunt-free. Yes indeed.

‘The noise reduction programme, called Wimbledon NetMix, allows people to fade out the sound of the players grunting on court, and turn up the volume of the commentators.’

Yes, human progress moves ever onwards. Every year our life is made a little better.

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4 Comments on “Anti-grunt technology”

  1. Jeff Says:

    Female juniors in the states are now coached to grunt.

  2. anna notaro Says:

    I don’t recall that much fuss about male grunters, like Agassi for example or others, so there must be something about women’s grunting (particularly at Wimbledon, the ‘purest’ of tennis tournaments, where white is the only color players can wear) and women’s sound in general that is more *distracting* and needs to be silenced (in some very interesting ways, at least according to ‘rebelsouljaz’, author of one of the comments on the YouTube Sharapova video)….
    This has nothing to do of course with the long history of controlling women’s bodies and their (powerful) sexuality, from the metal masks common punishment for nagging wives in the Middle Ages to other ‘moral’ prescriptions which still nowadays, in some cultures, expect virtuous women not to utter a sound during sexual intercourse. Mind you the above is just the product of a woman’s mind susceptible to over-analysing, I wonder when/whether a new technology will soon come out to fix that…

  3. David S Says:

    If only a technological device could be invented to silence nagging wives, though most men (including myself) have developed “selective hearing” techniques ;o)

    Joking aside, grunting in tennis is possibly a similiar technique to one used in martial arts to channel energy from the abdomen and startle the opponent (known as Kiai in Japanese)?

  4. Timothy Says:

    At least on TV and one’s computer one can turn the sound off. This not only spares one grunts, but also the excessive and unnecessary commentary. Of course one misses the sound of the balls, so there are trade-offs. But in the cinema, one cannot do this.

    Nevertheless the men’s semifinals in 3D was, in spite of Pat Cash, a quite new and wonderful cinematic experience. It is interesting to ponder how this new technology might revolutionize the economics of tennis, and perhaps other spectator sports


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